Tag: Emotions

  • Fear Failure

    Fear Failure

    A friend asked, “Why do I fear failure so much?” What a wonderful question. Here are three thoughts. 1 . The language of failure is painful and cuts deeply. “You are such a screw up!” “Loser!” “What’s wrong with you?” “Are you stupid?” 2 . In life you must answer a few, very basic questions.…

  • Three areas of Life

    Three areas of Life

    Chad Warner, addiction counselor, was speaking recently. He said, “You must work on three areas of your life. The three areas include; Spiritual Care, Self Care, and Marital Care.” Here’s my take on those three areas. Spiritual Care We are spiritual beings. We need a spiritual program. That program must explain life, death, purpose and…

  • Why I ask you…

    Why I ask you…

    When I ask you, about you, you get mad. When I ask you how come you don’t exercise more? You get mad? When I ask you about your unhealthy eating habits. You get mad. When I ask, Did you get that chore done? You get mad. When I ask you, about your plan to save…

  • The Problem today…

    The Problem today…

    Building on yesterday’s thought.) Review The Son/Husband built an emotional system for his mother and is now using it on his wife. His Rule: Don’t burden mom or wife. Keep all negative emotions to yourself. The Problem Today If he shut down emotionally at age 8. And, he’s now 38. Then he’s 30 years behind…

  • Growing up shaped you

    Growing up shaped you

    What if a young, son saw his mother struggling? Maybe, dad worked a lot, traveled regularly, or just left the family. And, mom daily complained about her heavy, sad life and how she can’t get everything done. Her son hears her sadness and comes up with a plan. He decides not be a burden to…

  • Two Emotional Battles

    Two Emotional Battles

    In life you have two emotional battles you must win.

  • What’s the point?

    What’s the point?

    I loved my dad. And, he loved me. He’s passed now. Dad had strengths and weaknesses. One weakness was he wanted me to move fast. If he asked me to do something he wanted it done now! And, he wanted it done fast. No discussion or explanation, just do it. And, do it fast. That…

  • Hungry for New Insights

    Hungry for New Insights

    I love working with motivated, emotionally confused, men. Often these men are caught in a relationship crisis and are looking for help. The men I most enjoy are hungry for new insights, strategies, and behaviors. They keep repeating. “Just tell us what to do!” It’s exciting because these men are like Cub Scouts packing for…

  • My Issue is Anger

    My Issue is Anger

    A brother responded to the last post. He said, “my issue is anger.” Now that I have taken ownership of this “odd behavior,” what do I do about it? Here are some suggestions. All glory to God. Amen

  • Appropriate and Odd

    Appropriate and Odd

    How does it make sense that an individual can be appropriate in one moment and emotionally “odd” in another? (I’m defining “emotionally odd” as- angry, controlling, defensive, anxious, going numb, etc.) David Zailer, author of Death of a Fisherman, was trying to understand why he went emotionally “numb” periodically. He had recently experienced an episode…

  • Expressing Myself

    Expressing Myself

    I had breakfast with a friend. He reminded me that he’d struggled with anger most of his life. Then, he said. I’ve made progress. And, I’m much better at managing my anger. But, I’ve discovered a new problem. I don’t know how to express my emotions. I stumble to find my words. It’s hard to…

  • Soul, Spirit, Etc.

    Soul, Spirit, Etc.

    What if there are always four systems at work in your life? 1 . YOUR SOUL- is a puzzle, picture of all your memories and thoughts. It includes everything from restful, peaceful feelings to tormented, restless feelings. Your whole emotional system = your soul. 2 . YOUR SPIRIT- You are a spirit that lives in…