There are two types of people: Connectors and Disconnects.

Emotional CONNECTORS love to talk, explore ideas, share insights, discuss relationships, and express feelings.

Talking makes them feel relaxed and safe. It also makes them feel known and loved. Talking and being known are very important to connectors.

Emotional DISCONNECTORS enjoy privacy. Growing up, no one wanted to know them. So today they live detached, and numb. Never being known, they certainly can’t help “you” feel known. They love escaping. Watching shows. Searching the internet. Playing video games. Getting lost in news, sports, or finances. Working on “learning self” and being known is totally out of their awareness. They hate deep emotional dialogue.

And, they frequently use the disconnecting tools of acting lost, being irritated, and getting angry.

Remember, they don’t know themselves. So, they CAN’T know you. And, they don’t know emotional interacting is a learnable skill set.

So, what happens after 30 years of marriage?

Option #1- The Disconnector fights against the Connector. The Disconnector never learns to connect. The couple dies in a lonely, disconnected marriage.

Option #2-The Connector leads and the Disconnector follows. The Disconnector learns connecting skills. In the end, they build a beautiful, deep, connected marriage.

Prayer

God, please help us connect. Spiritual-Emotional connectedness is your dream for our best life. Amen.