Here is an observation for discussion. It’s about early relationship development. There appears to be three stages. For this discussion the focus is on the third stage.

1. Dating – a man applies maximum effort to be in sync and to have many similarities with his date.
2. Married and Honeymoon – a husband applies a little less effort but still tries very hard to enjoy all their similarities.
3. Welcome to My Circle – here there is a shift to more self-disclosure.

Stage 3

Welcome to my circle: 

• You and me now live inside my circle.
• I will treat you like I treat myself.
• People outside the circle get special treatment.
• I do not run on compliments or praise.
• I am social but not emotional.
• I think and act like you are just like me.

More about life in his circle:

• If I don’t talk much, I don’t want you to talk much.
• If I don’t share my feelings, I’d rather you not share your feelings.
• If I like watching TV and being quiet, I want you to watch TV and be quiet.
• If I’m acting like a loner, I want you to act like a loner.
• If I’m okay running late, I want you to be okay running late.

I know we are different but for my comfort please live like I do. All opposite behaviors will be discouraged and at times punished. Welcome to life in my circle!

Prayer

Father, I know my circle is in you. And my wife’s circle is also in you. Thank you for accepting us. I know marriage is where we merge and create a beautiful Us circle, but that’s hard. Please keep growing me. (even if I resist sometimes.) Thank you for letting us live in you. You are the one true circle maker. Thank you abba, Jesus, and holy spirit. Amen.

Verse

A man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. (Circle) – Mark 10:7 (NIV)