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Equipping Christian Men for Richer Relationships

The Big Lie

The big lie is not what we tell others, it’s what we tell ourselves.

I love to think about emotions. I love reading about emotional health. And, I love listening to people’s emotional language and beliefs. My hope is that everyone begins or continues working on emotional health and growth.

I recently heard this statement (commonly known as “the big lie”) on a political radio program:

“If you repeat a lie long enough people will start to believe it.”

If you think about it, you could easily add: “And, if you repeat it often enough you also will start believing it yourself.”

Listen to the comments made by one man when I challenged him to change and work on emotional growth:

“I can’t change. I’ve always been this way. Why do people keep trying to change me. Even my wife wants me to change me. Don’t they understand God made me like this. I can’t change. And, if you don’t like it, you can change.”

Here is what I think he was saying when I heard this:

“As a boy, I learned to interact this way. I designed this way of interacting over many years. it mostly works. It is the only way I know how to interact with others. Changing is scary. And, who would I be if I did not continue the same?”

Emotional growth can be challenging, but it is immeasurably rewarding. What is your Big Lie? How much of who you think you are is really only just something you tell yourself and others? I challenge you to reflect on what you know about yourself and consider whether it’s the truth or not.

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Posted on

July 31, 2021

by

Stephen Cervantes

  • jonathan-rados-Sbxt82CsMxA-unsplash: Jonathan Rados on Unsplash

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All content copyright © 2025, Doctor Marriage, inc. unless otherwise specified, or included as fair use. No content on this website is intended to treat or diagnose any mental health issues. The content on this website is intended for educational purposes only.

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