To be successful in life you need two emotional programs. The first one is your surviving program. The second one is your thriving program.
Surviving
About the first program. It was written when you were very young and from a child’s understanding of life:
- Often driven by pain
- Includes how to interact with others
- Driven by a need to earn love, and
- Includes a way to succeed
It mostly defined you as a victim. This first program is a little harsh. It’s based on fear, performance, and a feeling of being poorly loved.
Thriving
About the second program:
- Written in adulthood (because the first program only partially works)
- Includes mature and adult thinking
- Fills in the missing pieces from the first program
- Contains spiritual truths
- Helps you run on more peace, rest, and joy
Sample first program beliefs
- I’m not good enough
- I’m different
- I don’t fit in
- Others won’t like me
- I’m in pain and no one cares
- Therefore I will act angry, anxious, detached or the opposite pleasing, caretaking, and over-trying.
Sample second program beliefs
- Jesus loves me. The Holy Spirit is counseling me. My Heavenly Father is the greatest lover of all times. And he has a love story, vision for my life.
- Since, I’m tired of hating on myself. I think I’ll start loving on myself.
- Since, I have not been able to punish myself into goodness. I think I’ll quit the self-punishment program.
- Since, no one is taking great care of me, I think I’ll start taking care of me.
Prayer
Father, I wrote the first program as a scared young boy. I am a man. The boy program is not working. Help me write a new program based on love, forgiveness, and kindness. Thank you for being the God of love and loving me. Help me operate out of greater love. Amen.
Bible
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the old thing has passed: the new creation has come. The old is gone the new is here. – 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NIV)