I don’t enjoy being alone with myself. I would much rather be in the company of others. If I am honest, I’m always looking for approval.

I work hard to be around people who enjoy me. As a young man, I longed for the approval of a woman. Female approval meant a little rest.

Every other guy I knew seemed to want the same. Approval made us feel normal. It calmed the inner struggle and quieted the fear that we were inadequate.

When someone shows approval, it feels like acceptance. It feels like safety. It feels like being good enough—and not feeling defective.

As a child, I rarely felt loved or safe.
I lived in my home but was often overlooked. No one really saw me or enjoyed me.
I longed to be noticed.

I dread the feeling of alone.

And I struggle in relationships because I never learned how to truly connect. Relationships can be full of failed expectations, misunderstandings, and disappointment.

Beliefs collide. Needs clash. Interests differ.

So I find myself caught in between:
not wanting to be alone, yet struggling to build a strong connection.

Close:

My struggle exists between the fear of being alone and thinking I’m defective and unlovable.

Prayer

Father, help me to need less approval from people. Teach me to rest in Your love instead of striving for theirs. Thank You for seeing me, knowing me, and loving me. Amen.

Scripture

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, humility, gentleness, and patience.”    Colossians 3:12