Here are two thinking errors for you to review:
- You can’t punish yourself into goodness.
- You can’t pleasure your way into being joyful.
You can’t punish yourself into goodness.
In parenting, we sometimes use punishment to help a child make better choices.
Examples include:
- You can’t go visit your friend because you didn’t do your chores.
- No dessert for you tonight. You did not use your inside voice.
As adults we adopt a similar approach. We think we should punish ourselves, after we make a mistake. Then, next time we’ll do better. As a result we become our own worst critic.
Examples include:
- You’re so stupid! You never learn.
- What’s wrong with you?
- Why can’t you be like other people?
If you are still being hard on yourself, please stop immediately. It does not work. You can’t punish yourself into goodness.
You can’t pleasure your way into being joyful.
Life is difficult. It’s full of challenges and trials. We must process through issues. Learn lessons. And, come out wiser on the other side. Some people think life is too hard. So, they overuse pleasure to ease life’s challenges.
Examples of overusing pleasure include regularly repeating:
- I’m so stressed. I need a drink.
- I had a bad day. I just need a few tokes.
- Getting lost in the internet helps me relax.
- Binging on weekends is just fun.
- Gambling relaxes me.
Joy lives at the intersection of spiritual service and emotional well-being. You can’t pleasure your way into being joyful.
Prayer
Father, Help me with growth and joy. This life is full of challenges, twists, and turns. I have been my own worst critic. And, I have picked pleasure and escaping over submission and growth. Help me walk the path of being joy-filled. I know You know the way. Bless me. Amen.
Meditate on these two bible verses:
“Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”
Romans 8:1, John 15:11 NIV
“I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete.”
Comments
One response to “Goodness and Joy-Not”
Hits home, thanks!