I’ve often heard this relationship statement.
“I want you to know me.”
My assumption was everyone knew what that meant. Then, I remembered two stories:
A 16-year-old daughter was sitting at the dinner table and said to her dad, “You’re so private. You’re a mystery. I don’t feel like I know you. I want to know you. I want to know your heart.” Her dad stopped eating and responded, “If you don’t know me by now, you probably never will.” Then, everyone finished their meal in silence.
And, there was that other time when a husband said to his wife. “I want to know you.” His wife responded. “I hate seafood. My favorite drink is Diet Coke. I drive through the car wash every two weeks. I like my pantry to be in order. I don’t eat onions. Italian is my favorite food. And, I like using coupons.” She then turned to her husband and said, “Now you know me.” Her husband sat stunned.
It never dawned on me that some people do not understand the statement, “I want to know you!”
Here is what I think it means:
- Share with me your fears and doubts.
- Tell me a story of deep disappointment.
- When was your heart broken?
- What was good about growing up and what was hard?
- When have you felt deeply loved?
- What’s a deep desire that lives in your soul?
- What makes your heart jump with delight?
And other, similar, deep, emotional questions. Deep connecting requires deep dialogue.
Verse
And the two will become one flesh. So, they are no longer two, but one flesh.
Mark 10:8 (NIV)
Prayer
Father, thank you that you know me. And, I can tell you anything. I feel safe and close to you. Help me feel safe, close, and known by my spouse. Help us be one. Amen